FIX YOU. If asked which pop group I disliked the most, those who know me well know that I will say: coldplay. And they will also know that apart from some animated gibberish about how they’re irritating because of their sense of fashion, their lack of tension in their music and the fact that they’re Anglo Saxon, I would not be able to coherently reason my choice of dislike. But the seed of the dislike was planted and now out of some silly stubbornness, I am unable to appear more open to the talents of coldpaly’s band members. The coming lines therefore can seem like sacrilege or the denouncing of my beliefs all in one.
There is one coldplay song that has got me. Today was not the first time I’ve heard it, but it was the first time I really heard it. The song was lying low in my brain somewhere. It was waiting for the right time to surface. All day long I was humming “the lights will guide you home”. I wasn’t even sure what the words meant or if they bore any significance, but I hummed and wrote the words on a post it and stuck it on my desk to remember. All of a sudden upon hearing the song again, I got it. I finally could understand and appreciate the tenderness of this soul ripping song. I understood the willingness of it to show the soul as a dartboard for all you cynics to take a shot at. I understood the amazing richness of emotion that surfaced with a simple little line. This emotion and sincerity, the fragile truth, the confessed weakness, the broken spirit, they’re all coming alive with one line. The lights will guide you home. Because home is what we all crave and home is what most of us never have. Home that is a haven. Home that is another human being with compassion and love. Home that IS love. Home where everyone is safe. Home that is a shelter from the evil because this world is not a nice place. The twinkling lights will always be there and they will guide you home; all you have to do is follow them. Just start walking and once you’ve gained momentum, the tears will dry on your cheeks and you will see, you will ultimately see, you will arrive and be a part of: a home. The lights will guide you home…
FORCA. The two things I struggle with the most are love and home. Maybe there is only one love for everyone. Maybe the real love is that person who saw to your core. Maybe it’s that person who sees your all, who loves your dark and who will always be your home. Because love is so abstract in my life, home can only be abstract as well. But if home is peace, then I know home. If home is love, then I know love. I know love because there’s been a person in my life who has taught me all I know, who has shown me all I see, and who has made me understand the simplicity of home and love and peace. My mom. To her, I owe everything: to her sensitivity and her sincere words. She says: “you’re my one success” and with an air of ease she proceeds to make the world bend backwards just for her. She resurrects broken down ideas and makes crutches for people who grew tired of life's scars. Her tenderness I was never able to imitate. I say with the most love: forca. If there was a point where you thought turning back was your only option, that point’s long gone. We’re all walking next to you, just an arms length away. Reach out and we’ll be there. We’re your safety net..we’re your lights that will guide you home. And teach me of honest things. Teach me to be better. Teach me to love more those who hurt me. Teach me to never be afraid. Teach me to have the love in my eyes like you. Teach me all you know so one day I can see the light that will guide me home.
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