will you roam with me

The melody is back with me. The songs I hear when I walk amongst the most secret places. The meandering paths that lead me to self discovery, lead me to make promises I mostly will not be able to keep. The narrow walkways and wide avenues that trick me into making grandiose statements, trick me into confidently believing. The streets I tread on are filled with wondrous musical notes once again. The streets never lost the music, they lost me. The streets where sins are laid, where burdens crack the surface have lured me back to where I belong.

I see the fault at every cross, at every carefully orchestrated seamless intersection. I drag my feet through miles of filth and I hear the whimpers of injustice echoed from the loudspeakers scattered around every strategic corner. Still the music makes me fly. It brought me here. It brought me home. Now there’s a more sentimental relationship between these streets and me. The absence has tarnished the hateful sights, erased the memories that made me want to escape. Never would I leave, never would I leave you. The weakness in a moment saw me sigh with disappointment, saddened by the state of the beloved place. One comfortable reset sends us back to a time when we can start to write something new. We are yet to see where it takes us.

The power in each gently vibrating musical note forces me to quicken my hasty steps then halts me abruptly, dangerously in the middle of a traffic filled street. I let myself be guided by whatever force takes hold of me. In peaceful weightlessness I cling to the past and welcome the unforeseeable future. The past I know has been unkind at times and that I must forgive. The future I know will scrape the healthy flesh off my skin, embalm me with petty disagreements, drape me in hateful cynicism. But in an unsuspecting corner of these wicked streets, a kind stranger will wrap me in endless grace. Then the stare and smile of the envious will lay upon my halo graced head. I will fall into the evening and all these wars will come to an end.

I have missed you these streets of mine. I have missed the music, the guide that helped me take my young and inexperienced heart through the winding alleys. Braveness I have never sacrificed for weakness. Meekness I have never betrayed for strength. Without forgiveness I cannot exist. I take what I am given, stripped of traces of identity, I still know full well who I am. Show me how you would paint your world, the world in which your music and your streets exist intertwined, inseparable. I am grateful for the music and for the streets. For the humility I have been taught. For the weightlessness I have been fortunate enough to have experienced. In the hope of a better, kinder tomorrow, I stare into the moon for as long as these notes, these letters, these thoughts, these feelings, these truths lasts.

For me you last forever.