An Evening

Not a day has passed and yet you’re already a memory. Nothing in me warned that you would capture my heart so wildly. There was no telling.

Since I’ve known myself, I have always been prone to your advances. Just a glance and your smile would linger. My stomach would shrink and your eyes so motionless conveyed your undying desire to have me. Yet a loveless future is what awaited me. Years later I saw you again, carelessly trying to make meaning of the puzzled feelings that rushed through you upon seeing my face.

Not a decade has passed and yet you’re my only one. Still. I stare into the present with hollow eyes and empty emotions. I did what needed to be done. Love seemed not important. Your hair grew long and curled carelessly on your forehead. I never saw you again, all the years we were married, I never ever saw you.

Now we’re in a different time, altogether altered zones of reality. This is my time; that is yours. The plane that you exist on is unknown to me. There’s no crossing to the other side. Whisper to never forget to let you know where I am. This is where I am.

I would have needed you with me tonight.

Somehow someone has engraved a name in my soul, but you seem to not see. For your eyes my all is blank, waiting for your soft knife. Now there is weight to time. There’s a serious and heavy burden that comes with the passing of time. Faces from a long time ago appear if we ask them. We both remember. Remember that lake, that tree, that bench, that cobble, that bridge, that piece of heaven, that lovely bush, that high fence, that forbidden kiss. But quickly reality comes to softly cover with a white sheet all these useless moments of perfection. There is no need. What lies dormant stays with us forever. Time passes. Weighs us down. Looks us in the eyes. He never comes. He wasn’t there. He never intended to hurt. Life passed without love. For me, much like for you.

But there was that one…

Evening.